Alien Romance, the daily comic strip

[gs_silva]

Okay, where were we? This scene is weird because there are abrupt mood changes in each installment. Ella had accused Maurice of ogling other women, and Maurice denied it but described the conversation he'd had with Owen on the porch of their shared multifamily house.

So Ella teases Maurice about caring that he and Ren look 'funny' together.

"You can shag Ren sideways, for all I care. But Cathy implied you were checking out other girls," Ella says.

"I wasn't!" Maurice insists. "Okay, I mighta said some things. But they were judging me! I felt cornered! Owen with his whole, "Oh, I don't mean to be rude! Hahaha! You just look funny! And Cathy: "Don't be embarrassed! I still love you!" I'm NOT embarrassed. I've spent huge amounts of time making myself not be self-conscious. Even though all of society wants me to. TV thinks I'm nothing but comic relief. Undesirable. Feeling good about myself? Nope! Can't have that! I spent two years trying to figure out how to enter the dating scene, before Cathy showed up, 'cause there's no guide for people like me."

"I'm sorry, Maurice. You're right," says Ella. "Our society is needlessly hostile to Asians."

Maurice scowls and finally replies, "...I meant short guys."

Ella holds her head in her hands. "Oh! Oh geez. Recalibrating!"

"That too, Sure," Maurice says. "I haven't even dealt with that part as much. I don't know how to start."

"They're kinda related. Maybe you can double up and overcome them both!" Ella suggests. "Low self-esteem is hard, even when you don't feel like everyone is telling you you need to have it." She should know! Ella is the girl who realizes early in life that society's pressures on women are nonsense, but then doesn't have the tools to deal with this realization, so she just sits on it, occasionally being cynical about it, and the years go by. At this point she's just overcome the pressure of needing a man to make her feel complete, and would really rather be a lesbian. She has yet to realize that she can also be a tepid lesbian.

"I don't just feel it. That's literally what happened yesterday," Maurice asserts.

"Sorry. That sucks," says Ella. "Hey, Arzy, if it's any comfort, that time you asked me out... I did briefly consider it."

Next post will be another change in tone! Confiding in Ella isn't always a bad thing, but it helps to have a thick skin and be tolerant of whiplash. She's a quick thinker but not a deep thinker.

***

I have a character development concept I came up with years ago: how easily influenced a character is by external input. Very impressionable people who are insecure and/or who look for outside validation are on one end of the spectrum, and those who are self-contained and difficult to influence are on the other end. Of course, you can occupy different spots at different times. Maturity may also move you closer to one end than the other.

Ella is my most naturally self-contained character. What's going on inside her head is louder than what's going on around her. She doesn't know how to manage it, so she's developed a simplistic self-concept to explain herself to herself. Something like, "I'm weird and cynical and I don't make friends easily." Later generations might accuse her of being "too much" or "extra" or maybe "basic" (because 'extra' and 'basic' are nonsense concepts so you can just level either one of them at people you're annoyed at).

She's not dumb, and she'll actually adapt to unexpected developments in an instant. She's pretty good at utilizing the adrenaline rush in a crisis. And she's good at long-term management, too. But some people might feel like interacting with her is like hugging a porcupine.

She's purposely gentle with Maurice, but sometimes not enough. I intended them to be good friends, but on paper they bicker pretty much constantly. It's gotten me in trouble. I played them both in a freeform RP once and it blew up in my face so badly... OMG.... so badly. I don't even know why it went wrong, but multiple people swore up and down that it was so bad they couldn't even bear to discuss it with me.

Welp.

Two more RPs later (with completely different people) and I think I've sworn off RPing with these characters forever. If I forget this and decide to try again, please track me down and ring my doorbell and tell me you won't leave my house until I change my mind. It's not worth it anymore. It never was. Follow my instincts! I don't CARE how much fun it SOUNDS!

And I'm not that into D&D anymore either. I still love the concept, but I've started to struggle with the process of doing it. I think...

...I just...

don't roleplay anymore.

I'd still do crossovers. The kind where my contribution is playing off of other people's contributions, but still somewhat self-contained.